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Showing posts from January, 2011

what is grief?

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Experts identify waves or stages of mourning that manifest as different thoughts and feelings, but their models fail to acknowledge that these waves arise within a greater ocean that is not an emotion but a prolonged state of shock. Although loss precipitates all kinds of emotional reactions, grief itself is not one. Rather, it is the background of them all, the agonizing sense that something vital has gone missing or been stolen, as the etymology of bereavement (from be + reafian "rob, plunder") suggests.

John Bowlby studied loss and attachment very closely. In an institutional setting where toddlers were separated from their mothers for extended periods, he and his colleague James Robertson observed how a lively, healthy child gradually moves from a state of agitation to ornery rebellion to, finally, a state of complete despondency when he loses all hope of his mother's return. The team collated their findings into a poignant documentary called A two-year-old goes to ho…

slay the buddha

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Whatever you encounter,
either within or without,
slay it at once:
on meeting a buddha
slay the buddha
~Linji


I meet the Buddha everywhere
in the solemnity of sangha ritual
in my own sitting reverent
in my feigned humility before my teacher
in my desiring heart’s desire
craving, thirsting Buddha everywhere
Buddha!
God, Father, Robber on the road
You drop me to my knees
fearful and trembling
Now that I’ve raised You up
I’ll spit on you
“Buddha is a shit stick”
“Kill the Buddha”

Say NO to Buddha

That's what the masters say