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out of la la land

My phoenix long ago secured
His nest in sky-vault's cope; 
In the body's cage immured
He is weary of life's hope
~ Hafiz


I met a retired woman yesterday who finally, after years of toxic relationships with exes, parents, siblings and peers- it began in primary school when she was bullied- said to me with a great sigh of relief, "I've finally woken up; I'm out of La La Land, and I'm never going back."

She was a serial victim, not due to weakness or so-called "co-dependency" needs... but due to, as she put it, "dangerous naivety" or as I like to call it: pathological trust.

She had an idealism and hope that just wouldn't die; a good heart and misplaced faith which led her to place her trust time and again in the wrong people and situations.  Yes the roots of her poor judgment went back to early childhood. She'd been somewhat neglected by absent and hypercritical parents.  But she was not particulalry needy or dependent.  She had …

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